my parents expect so much out of me

[greg]

my parents expect so much out of me bc my sis is a senior and a top starait a studet who is little mis perfect. the past year we had to take our state tests i did really bad on my l.a part so now there making me take a summer class to live up to what my sis like in the past my parents have always thought that i needed help in a class i got lower than a 85 in. so they had me tutored had now it screws me up wit different methods and all
. on top of that when my sister leaves next summer i have a feeling its going to be more down my throsat.
pplz send help

[guest]

my parents expect so much out of me bc my sis is a senior and a top starait a studet who is little mis perfect. the past year we had to take our state tests i did really bad on my l.a part so now there making me take a summer class to live up to what my sis like in the past my parents have always thought that i needed help in a class i got lower than a 85 in. so they had me tutored had now it screws me up wit different methods and all
. on top of that when my sister leaves next summer i have a feeling its going to be more down my throsat.
pplz send help

Tell your parents to quit comparing you and leave it at that. Next time they do it say "I told you to quit comparing us." Continue to be yourself and make them respect who you are by standing up for yourself and refusing to dignify an arguement over it. Tutoring can't hurt and good grades will get you into college (if that is what you choose to do). Education is not bad and as long as you do your best then you can tell your parents that.

[greg]

thnaks for the replay thats a greta i dea i know having my parents nag for good grades is normal but i hope things change

[greg]

well so far nothin helped and now they nag on me to get every thing done and my sis is sitting there "watchin" a movie wit her b/f with a 3000 word essay due in 2 days with only 300 words done and my parentes r worried about me getting 12 math probs done thats due in like a week and plz send somthing some one befor this stupid hurricane hits us here in floirda

[meee]

I know it's difficult to hear, but parents will always worry about the progress of their kids. I doubt there's anyway to stop them nagging at you, but this doesn't mean that you can't ignore it.

Whenever I have been nagged by my father I have calmly walked to my room and turned my music on as loud as possible to drown it out. The nagging is very stressful, and parents don't realise that it doesn't motivate people.

It's YOUR life and you can do whatever the hell you want with it. Try your best at getting good grades by all means, but don't feel that you should try and live up to your parents' expectations.

[curiousbinature]

Just reading over this topic, and thought I would add in a parental point of view for you.

Although at your age it may be hard to understand, a parents "job" is to raise their children to be able to function in the world as an individual/adult. That is the responsibility (and a tuff one at that) that they decide on when they chose to have a child.

Every parent will make mistakes in trying to do this, as there are no instruction manuals for raising children. We do the best we can with what we have. And yes, we do get it worong sometimes.

The comment that "it is your life you do whatever the hell you want". well this is a true comment, but as long as you live in your parents house, you will have to live by their rules....and asking you to do your best to get good grades to make somthing out of ourself, is not really asking too much.

When you think you really have it bad, maybe you should take a trip to a foster care home, or to the streets where children your age are living because they thought they had it bad at home. The you can compare your life and how bad you have it. When your beaten, abused and not cared for, then you have earned the right to complain about your life.

From where I am sitting, I see concerened parents trying to do the best they can. I agree comparing siblings grades, etc. is not good. But give your parents a break, they give you everything you need to survive in this world, yet when they get some things wrong you condemn them.

Love them for who they are, understand they will make mistakes, and always strive to do the best you can (not for them, but for yourself).

Until you become a parent you cannot judge their motives, but always remember they have already been your age, so they do know some of where your coming from

And the nagging part.....if you listen the first time, they would not have to nag continually....think about that before you close yourself in a room and turn the music up. In real life, you can't just shut out what you don't want to hear. Rules, regulations and restirctions are all part of the real world, the quicker you learn this the better off you are. They never go away.

Take it for what it is worth....

Sincerely,

Parent of 3

[Alysje]

Hi, My name's Liz. I just wondered if you could give me some advice. I get average grades at school. Yes i get bad grades too, but for my tests i try really hard and still i get a bad grade. I know it sounds like an excuse anyone would use, but for me it's not; really! Whe i show my grades to my parents they flip. Especially my mom. She says i can do much much better. To of my teachers one is math. She told me that she thinks that i am one of the few people who can't do math. She offered to help. but i bearly have time. When i tell my mom she siys it's an excuse! I just want them to see that this is my best and i can't do more then that.

Please help me, i don't know what to do.
I'm desperate!

-ALysje-

[Cass]

Parents worry. Do you have a friend that you can study with - someone who understands? Sometimes being with someone can help. Try to explain that your best is your best. I wonder if you can talk to staff in school.[/code]

[trinity]

speaking as a parent as long as i know my kids have tried their hardest and done their best thats all i ask and as for comparing the two of you that should never be done bedause you are both different people with different strengths.